This whole pubic hair thing can be so confusing sometimes.
Should I keep it? Should I get rid of it?
What do I REALLY want?
Am I just removing it because my partner wants me to or that’s what all my friends are doing?
Then there’s the judgement I’ve noticed from both the pro-pubic hair and the anti-pubic hair camps.
“OMG, why would you wax your pubic hair!? It makes you look like an 8 year old girl! How could you feel like a woman like THAT?”
“Wow, she’s got this MASSIVE BUSH. It’s kinda gross. So hairy! How does her partner even find anything down there!?”
Ugh. It’s never nice to be judged. And judging people doesn’t feel that great either.
So I wanted to write an article about this to get a little clear on why people do what they do with pubic hair – and what you should REALLY be doing with yours.
First, some perspective…
13 Reasons why some women choose to KEEP their pubic hair – opting for either a trimmed or wild and free hairstyle…
- They love that it’s natural and requires minimal effort – nice and easy!
- It feels more pleasurable to them during intimacy.
- They enjoy the look / feel of having pubic hair
- They have a partner who enjoys the look / feel of their pubic hair
- They’ve read that pubic hair “enhances the microflora (healthy, helpful microbes) as it absorbs sweat and moves harmful particles out of the way of entering the vaginal and urethral areas.” (According to Doctor Nasimeh Yazdani, MD)
- They’d prefer to avoid ingrown hairs or scars forming from long-term hair removal
- They want to avoid pain or injury with waxing, plucking or shaving
- They feel more sexy and womanly with pubic hair
- It seems more hygenic to have hair down there
- They feel less exposed / more protected in that area
- They feel more free and connected to their Yoni with hair
- They’ve never considered removing it due to feeling comfortable as it is / fear of pain / conditioning
- It feels right for them personally
13 Reasons why some women choose to REMOVE their pubic hair – opting for a smooth and simple style…
- They enjoy grooming practices
- They enjoy the look / feel of not having pubic hair
- They have a partner who enjoys the look / feel of them not having pubic hair
- It feels more pleasurable to them during intimacy
- It feels more sensitive during oral sex for them
- They’ve found a not-so-painful way to remove it
- It seems more hygienic to them to not have hair down there
- They have a great waxing professional who they see as part of a self-care routine
- They feel more sexy and womanly without pubic hair
- They’ve been taught in Tantra workshops that they might experience more sensation and pleasure without pubic hair, which may lead to very spiritual experiences 😉
- They feel more free and connected to their Yoni without hair
- They feel pressure to remove it due to cultural conditioning and the effects of porn
- It feels right for them personally
And then my personal pubic hair story…
For years I loved having wild and free pubic hair. During my mid 20s I loved being naked at hippie festivals and nudist beaches but also loved having a bush to ‘hide behind’. I enjoyed the ease of not needing to do much down there.
Then in my late 20s, I became interested in ‘conscious sexuality’ and ‘Tantra’ practices and approaches, and discovered that pretty much ALL of the women I met through those circles in Europe chose to remove their pubic hair for better sensation and pleasure.
After resisting for a year or so, I got curious and finally caved. I tried waxing for the first time and LOVED the smooth sensation of not having pubic hair. Sex felt more pleasurable and oral sex was a whole other world (although that might also have had something to do with my lover at the time!)
Then I had a bad experience waxing. Like seriously bad.
A new employee at the waxing place I went to accidentally waxed MY CLITORIS.
The pain was excruciating for hours. I couldn’t walk properly for the rest of the day. I could kinda walk, but it was more of an open-legged waddle.
I went back to hair for a while, then eventually waxed again some time later (no more accidents happened after that!)
Now I’ve settled into my own flow with it.
Sometimes I have pubic hair. Sometimes I don’t.
For when I do feel like waxing, I have a GREAT waxing lady in Byron Bay who I love – there’s hardly any pain and we have a lovely chat while I’m in a compromising position on the table.
Personally, I notice that I feel more inspired sexually and more likely to explore my Yoni when I don’t have pubic hair.
But that’s just me.
We’re all different – which is why I don’t judge others hair habits or preferences.
So, What should you REALLY be doing with your pubic hair?
Honestly? Whatever the F you want.
Don’t let anyone tell you what you SHOULD be doing with ANYTHING.
Leave it wild and free. Trim it. Create crazy patterns in it. Wax it. Shave it. Laser it (if you’re really sure as that one is permanent!)
If your pubic hairstyle is stuck in a rut (and NOT feeling great) you could consider trying something different.
If you’re feeling good with the way things are, just let it be.
If you notice you’ve been doing it a certain way JUST to please someone else, or because that’s what everyone does or that’s how women look in porn… it might be time to really tune in to what YOU actually want.
What you choose to do with your pubic hair is YOUR business. Just like you can do whatever you want with the hair on your head – you can do whatever you want with the hair in your panties.
It’s your hair and it’s your vulva!
Enjoy it your way.
xx Bonnie Bliss
PS. If you’re inspired to re-enliven your relationship with your Yoni (vagina) – We offer Yoni Mapping Therapy – a powerful modality for reconnecting to your pelvic region. We have trained practitioners all over Australia (and other parts of the world!) Find out more about the modality here if you’re inspired to see if it could be right for you – and (hopefully) find a practitioner near you here.